Pun-tastic: The cheesiest dad jokes revealed

Thortful tasked the UK to submit their cheesiest dad one-liners and vote for the joke they believe to be the most cringeworthy.

Having analysed the entries and votes, Thortful revealed the corniest dad pun of all, as voted for by the nation, is “My wife says I never listen. Funny way to start a conversation if you ask me.”

The top ten dad jokes are as followed:

1. My wife says I never listen. Funny way to start a conversation if you ask me.

2. My son asked me to stop singing Oasis songs in public. I said maybe.

3. My wife is furious that our next-door neighbour has started sunbathing nude in her garden. Personally, I’m on the fence.

4. When the wife finds out I have replaced our bed with a trampoline... she's going to hit the roof.

5. My wife said I never buy her flowers. I didn't even know she sold flowers.

6. I went for an interview. They said, “Can you perform under pressure?” I said “I’m not sure about that but I can have a good crack at Bohemian Rhapsody”

7. My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing him. Went out. Had a few drinks. Nice guy. He’s a web designer.

8. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes... She gave me a hug.

9. Today, my son asked, "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is John.

10. Been out washing the car with my son. He said Dad why don’t you use a sponge like the other dads?

Jokes that didn’t make the top ten include ‘Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere!’, ‘Where do average things get made.....the satisfactory’ and ‘What do you call a Welsh singer who never gets lost? Tomtom Jones.’

To see all of the dad joke submissions, view the index here.