The Apprentice 2012 - TV review
The Apprentice 2012 is under way, and only 15 candidates remain after Lord Sugar last night jabbed his feared finger in the direction of his first victim.
The Apprentice 2012 is under way, and only 15 candidates remain after Lord Sugar last night jabbed his feared finger in the direction of his first victim.
It was taxi for Bilyana the Bulgarian know-it-all at the end of the opening episode, with many more to be riding home solo over the coming weeks clutching their suitcases, assuring us their hidden talents have been missed.
But not before they have engaged in the annual back-stabbing massacre that has proved such a hit for the BBC – we are now onto the programme's eighth season.
This year's crop of the "best business brains in Britain" includes the likes of recruitment team leader Ricky Martin who is a wrestler by night.
He certainly grabbed the title of the cheesiest introduction with his: "I am the reflection of perfection."
There's always one isn't there, or in this case maybe two or three . . . or 16.
Other stand-out "characters" are restaurateur Maria O'Connor who intelligently summed up a fellow contestant's architectural skills saying: "As an architect she can draw. That's it. She can draw buildings."
And Stephen Brady will not doubt be making himself heard over the coming weeks with his philosophy: "Business is very simple but it is made complicated by idiots."
Not to be outdone on the cliches, Lord Sugar – supported again by his lieutenants Nick Hewer and Karren Brady – was soon bursting through the boardroom doors to tell his hopefuls: "This is not about a job any more and I'm not looking for a friend, if I wanted a friend I'd get a dog. I'm looking for a partner, the Marks to my Spencer, the Lennon to my McCartney."
Like last year the candidates are vying for an investment of £250,000 and the chance to gain the country's best known entrepreneur as a business partner.
The first task last night was Blank Canvas and the teams, split into men and women, were challenged to turn blank products like bags, T-shirts and teddies into saleable items by printing designs on them.
And so we were off again down that familiar road of people barking down mobile phones while dashing around London in black cabs stressing about margins and bottom lines while Nick and Karen scowl over their shoulders making notes.
Last night the girls clearly had the best design with Jade's impressive drawings for children, but the boys paid attention to their numbers and won the day. Team leader Gabrielle Omar dragged in Bilyana Apostolova and the "blonde assassin" Katie Wright for a fight to the death in the boardroom and Bilyana talked herself into an early exit while Katie stayed quiet and lived to fight another day.
But as Bilyana headed off into the night blaming this, that and the other, I was just relieved I could turn over and I wonder how much longer audiences in general will stay with The Apprentice, which has already spawned Celebrity Apprentice and the Young Apprentice to boot.
To quote another well-known TV show aimed at entrepreneurs, "I'm out."
Ben Lammas
