Deal or No Deal - TV review
No deal, Noel. The answer from now on will always be no deal.
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No deal, Noel. The answer from now on will always be no deal.
When Mr Blobby's right-hand man and his 22 boxes first appeared on our screens seven years ago, Deal or No Deal was a fairly slick affair.
The contestants rattled through the game with no fuss and its simplicity was strangely addictive.
These days, you have to wade through a stinking pile of cosmic chit chat and references to pilgrims and walks of wealth.
Confused? Me too.
There are too many rituals, too many in-jokes and the contestants are guilty of drama school levels of over acting.
Take last night's contestant, 23-year-old Jacob Shaw from Huddersfield.
The music student broke down in tears, performed a saxophone solo and delivered a speech about his granddad's lucky stopwatch akin to Christopher Walken's monologue in Pulp Fiction.
These days, the shows feels as though the inmates have taken over the asylum – with Noel Edmonds playing the part of the bonkers doctor perfectly.
He's even got the creepy beard.
In between the madness – there was also a wide-eyed pensioner who hid behind his box before struggling to open it, another who was laughing too much to speak and Noel chatting about spanking the Banker – the game itself was playing out.
Poor Jacob lost the £250,000 jackpot early doors, followed by the booby prize of 1p.
The Banker, the mysterious voice on the end of the phone, now just plays a bit part.
Once the elusive star of the show, the old dear doesn't do much anymore.
And who can blame him when he's up against the shrieking, hopping hysteria of the contestants?
I'd disconnect the line if I was him, leave them to it.
They probably won't even notice he's gone, too busy weighing up the cosmic probability of whipping out a red.
For those who have yet to zone in on the show which made its UK debut in 2005, Deal or No Deal is filmed in the round, a simple game of chance and nerve.
It features a single contestant trying to beat the Banker, as they open 22 identical sealed red boxes assigned to potential contestants in an order of their choosing.
The boxes contain randomly assigned sums of money inside ranging from 1p to £250,000.
The day's contestant is selected at the beginning, bringing their box to the chair.
The gameplay is co-ordinated by Edmonds, and the objective is for the contestant to leave with more money than the Banker is prepared to deal for the box, while the element of risk is that by not dealing, or holding out for better deals, their luck can change and the amount won can be relatively low, or even nothing.
No wonder Noel Edmonds's enthusiasm for the show continues – it rescued him from the TV wilderness. But back to last night . . . in between wiping away the tears and delivering toe-curling pieces to camera, Jacob slowly got rid of more and more boxes and in the end settled for a respectable £11,000.
All in all, it's time Noel & Co went back to basics and sharpened things up.
Producers really need to strip back the silliness and get back to the exciting, unpredictable nature of the game of chance which has made it a broadcasting phenomenon across the world.
No changes? No Deal.
Elizabeth Joyce