Army wives keep Christmas while husbands are in Afghanistan

Christmas is a time for family, but a group of Shropshire wives will be sitting down to lunch tomorrow while their husbands are fighting a war far from home.

"I would cancel Christmas if I could," says Sammi Jones.

This was no idle threat, nor simply frustration at the latest round of festive shopping, or even weather-fatique at the continued cold snap.

Sammi would just love to put December 25 on hold so that all her family could be together for Christmas.

She is one of the wives at Tern Hill barracks in North Shropshire, where the 1st Battalion The Royal Irish are based - and, more importantly, one of the many who will have to celebrate this Christmas without their husbands.

Fortunately she is one of a tight-knit group of four friends who are also all related and have come to depend on each other probably more than any friends should.

Because three of their husbands are in Afghanistan this Christmas, robbing a family of three of its members at such a crucial time of year for loved ones.

In their number, it means six children will wake up to the excitement of Christmas morning without their fathers, and of course constantly live with the threat that he may never come home.

Luckily - and Sammi admits this as we chat together with her twin sister Amanda Reynolds, and cousins Katie Jackson and Nikki Bevan - she can't cancel Christmas because she has three wonderful children who are all under six years old who can't wait for the man in the red suit to arrive tonight.

It's why she will pack them all up and head to her sister's this evening to celebrate with her and her husband, and their five children aged from five months to 11.

It will be a full and busy house, and that's just what she needs.

Amanda knows that more than most, having spent several Christmases without her husband, Junior NCO Liam Reynolds.

"It's being alone that is the most difficult part and celebrating something that you know you should be sharing with your husband," she says.

"It's why I just couldn't have Sammi waking up on her own this year, or more importantly sitting down on her own on Christmas Eve after the children had gone to bed.

"That's when it really hits you how far away they are, and just how much you have missed them."

Amanda's husband Liam is at home this year working with the welfare team at Tern Hill, but in a twist of the life they have come to accept she knows deep down he would rather be standing shoulder-to-shoulder with his fellow troops.

"I know he will adore being here with the children on Christmas morning and that feeling will go away, but I also know he would dearly love to be out there.

"It is terribly frustrating for the ones left at home that their friends may be in danger and there is nothing they can do about it."

For Katie, who is mum to baby Alex aged 17 months, there is also the temptation to pretend the festive season is just not happening. But she, again, has depended on family to get her through it.

Clearly feeling bereft at not having husband Ranger Daniel Jackson at home this year, she is struggling to face the big day without him.

"I was only just married a matter of months when Daniel went on tour and I think I just slept through it hardly wanting to get out of bed.

"But Alex does stop me from wallowing. He needs me to be better than that and I am going home to my mum's which will be great.

"For me, the hardest thing is that Alex has changed so much and although last Christmas was officially his first I think this year he understands more and I would love Daniel to be here to see it. I have invested in a camcorder so I can record every minute and he can watch it when he comes home in January.

"It is tough sometimes watching your children grow and knowing that your husband is missing those landmarks.

"Alex was such a daddy's boy before he left and I just hope he will be as excited as I am to see him. I know that if Alex was suddenly afraid to go to him after such a long time apart it would break Daniel's heart."

For Nikki, she would also love to just be a complete family this year for the sake of her girls Ella, two, and Caitlyn, 16 months.

But like her friends all meeting together once again at the community centre at Tern Hill, they knew this was the life they were marrying into and they now draw comfort from the support they have to cope with it.

"We did know what this life was about but I suppose you don't really understand how difficult the reality is until you actually live it. That's why these girls are so important to me because no-one else really understands. I couldn't do it without them.

"Equally, the support at Tern Hill is great and even more so for this tour. The welfare team have been fantastic organising things every weekend to help the time go by even quicker.

"The weekends and the evenings are the most difficult because that's when you would expect them to be around and I suppose it's when you let yourself think too much about them being away and where they are and then dangers they face.

"Keeping busy just lets you count down one more month, one more week, one more day until they are home."

Nikki's husband, Ranger Scott Bevan, will be the last to return in early February but all four girls are planning belated Christmas celebrations for their boys when they get home.

And they are also grateful for a renewed support nationally for the troops serving in Afghanistan.

Sammi said events like the recent Millies - a military awards ceremony held in London - helped to remind people of the sacrifices being made and the families who potentially have so much to lose, and not just Christmas Day together.

"It is some comfort especially when we see how proud our children are of what their fathers are doing. They miss out on so much of their everyday life with a parent they love so much and one who could be taken from then at any time and it gives them something back.

"We may not all be together this Christmas but we are all family and so desperately proud of all those troops serving abroad and that is what will get us through."

By Tracey O'Sullivan