Family shares stories of boy, 3, and terminally ill dad to show vital role of hospice

Kate Lythgoe and her son William are pictured on the front of 17,000 envelopes being sent to supporters of the charity next week, while their story is featured on the newsletter inside.

The family has been supported by Tŷ Gobaith, the North Wales part of the Shropshire hospice, since William was a baby. But it was when Kate needed time to nurse her terminally ill dad, that the nursing team really came to her rescue providing crisis care for her seriously ill son and giving Kate precious time to comfort her dad and plan his end of life care.

Kate, from Prestatyn, says she cannot thank the hospice team enough for giving her precious days to be with her dad and hold his hand.

William was born in the summer of 2018, just three months after Kate’s mum had died suddenly of a heart condition.

During his birth, William’s brain was starved of oxygen and he suffered severe hypoxic brain damage.

“Initially he was born without a heartbeat. He was resuscitated and taken to neonatal intensive care, and we were told to expect the worst. I was very poorly too and in intensive care myself,” Kate said.

“Will was a chubby beautiful baby and you wouldn’t have known anything was wrong other than the severe bruising he had and the tubes going into his body.

“Me and Andy made the difficult decision that with the severity of Will’s problems we were probably going to have to let him go. His older brothers came to say hello to Will and hold his hand and kiss him, but say goodbye too just in case.”

William was referred to Tŷ Gobaith by his consultant. Kate had heard of Hope House and Tŷ Gobaith because she had signed up to play their fundraising lottery, but she, like many others, never thought that she would need their help andvisited for the first time with William and older brother Sam, 10.

“Sam thought it was amazing, like one big family rather than a hospital because the equipment was there, but not obvious. He told his older brothers Josh and Jacob that Will was safe and well looked after.”

During this time Kate’s dad Terry had been diagnosed with incurable cancer and was undergoing chemotherapy. She and Andy had sadly separated too.

“When Dad was in hospital I was torn because I really needed to be with him. Andy has a condition which means he is unable to care for Will overnight and I didn’t know what to do. So I phoned Tŷ Gobaith to see if they could help.

“I was able to drop Will off at really short notice and know he was in safe hands. They gave me those precious days so me and my sister Nic could stay with Dad and hold his hand. I arranged to bring him home for end of life care, and I just couldn’t have done that without the support of Tŷ Gobaith.”

She said it was hard to think of the future: “Will has defied the odds so far but we live for every day because the future is so uncertain. Will was so unwell in November and that showed me how quickly he can deteriorate.

“His brothers all adore him and he is the total focus of this family.

“It is comforting to know too that should the worst happen Tŷ Gobaith will be there. Nobody ever wants to use a children’s hospice, but when you do need it you are so grateful that it is there.”

If you would like to help Hope House and Tŷ Gobaith Children’s Hospices go to the online appeal hopehouse.org.uk/williams-story.