Wem mother worries about 'forgotten few' with learning difficulties
People with severe learning difficulties who are unable to see their families have become “the forgotten few” in the words of a devoted Shropshire mother.
Anne and Rob Payne moved to Wem from Shrewsbury last year. The couple have a 24-year-old son, Adam, who has significant learning difficulties and is non-verbal.
Since last summer he has been living in a residential setting in Kidderminster where he receives around-the-clock care. Though it took time for him to settle there, Anne said he has “come on leaps and bounds”.
She is full of praise for the staff at the placement, who have made him feel part of “one big family”, taken him on trips and helped him enjoy life.
But part of his happiness depended on seeing his parents every weekend, either at the home or at their house in Wem, and their arrangements were thrown into uncertainty by the coronavirus lockdown.
Their weekend meetings have been allowed to continue, albeit only in outdoor places where Adam is accompanied by three carers and with the condition that Anne and Rob return negative coronavirus tests before meeting.
Since late March, they have only been able to see their son in person three times, either because they have had to cancel in the face of unpredictable weather (rain can upset Adam) or because the test results have been sent out late – the couple have to travel to Ironbridge and back to get tested on a Friday night and anxiously wait for their results in the hope of seeing Adam on Sunday.
Anne said: “The nearest place we can go to get a test is Ironbridge – a 60-mile round trip after my husband has been driving all day. We then have to email the results to the home.
“Once we had a test and the results didn’t come in until 1pm on the Sunday. By the time we got the results to them it was too late because my son had fallen asleep. It’s a 60-mile round trip and then it might rain and you can’t go.”
The couple understand the need to be careful, but Anne has begun to worry about the effects of the isolation on Adam – he has shown signs of regressing into his previous depression and distressed behaviour. “I’m not blaming the home because they are doing their utmost for Adam and all their residents.
Exemptions
“We have to wear a mask, we have to socially distance [when we see him]. I know this is all very thorough and they are looking out for their residents.
“He has got a birthday coming up in three weeks, and we had hoped he could come for a home visit. But at the moment, if it’s not a nice day, we can’t see him on his birthday.”
Anne hopes that the Government soon issues more guidance and considers exemptions for the relatives of people like Adam, who are confused and isolated.
She said: “There are a lot of people who have got relations in this situation. I feel they have become the forgotten few.
“I have got a cousin in Rhyl, she has got an autistic son in a residential placement. She went to the Welsh Government and they have actually stated to the social services in that area that they can make an exception for people with special needs.
“It’s not about Adam’s care or the home, he is really happy there. It is about the bigger picture.”
