Cathy Dobbs: Kick-off for Rishi . . . but for how long?

It has been a dramatic week at Westminster Un-united, where prime ministers have become more like football managers. If they don’t perform as expected, kick them out and get in someone new. Liz didn’t even have time to start thinking about changing the wallpaper at Number 10 before she was shown the red card. So, will MPs get behind Rishi as he steps into the premiership – could we finally have a keeper? I wouldn’t bet on it.

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Talking of football, I’ve realised this week that I’m not the only parent trying to get my head around eSports. It seems it’s worth thousands of pounds to the players, who compete from their armchairs and yet there isn’t a football, goal or pitch in sight. Wolves and West Brom have teams that represent the club in the ePremier League – and the kids love it! Still confused? Yep, join the club.

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If we’re honest - being a parent can be tough, and at times it’s easy to understand why some people would choose to have a child-free life. From the lay-ins and tidy house to the spontaneous weekends away and extra cash – life without kids is definitely more indulgent. Also, a child-free life makes it easier to climb the career ladder. However, it’s surprising to see that the decision not to have children has become a movement on social media. It even has its own hashtags - #nothavingkids and #childfreebychoice. In a few decades this short-sighted lot will probably have the hashtags #novisitorsagain and #whereisthelove

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There are many reasons why someone may not have children – most of them are not by choice. From fertility issues to not finding the right person to have a child with, women face more barriers to motherhood than ever before. And this is evident in figures which show that birth rates are dropping. While the global population is expected to grow until around 2080, and then dip, it’s undeveloped countries that are driving the population growth. Populations in developed countries are expected to halve by 2100, something that billionaire Elon Musk, has called “one of the biggest risks to civilisation”. Other countries are offering cash bonuses, and tax exemptions to parents in a bid to reverse this decline. Thankfully Labour is probably coming into power in a couple of years, and there’s nothing the left love more than coming up with new benefits. So, bring on the life-changing Bonk for Britain benefit that all 30-somethings will soon be claiming.

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In the last week we’ve seen how having too much money clearly sends you bonkers. Take the interview billionaire Kanye West, now known as Ye, did with Pierce Morgan. He garbled his way through the interview, seemingly unable to put a sensible argument together. Then billionaire Aileen Getty is bankrolling the sticky hand gangs that are glueing themselves to artworks and tipping milk everywhere. What’s next – Elon Musk flying a Tesla to Mars and Richard Branson running for Prime Minister? Nah, not even Richard Branson is that crazy.