Peter Rhodes on forgetting wars, mental arithmetic and police officers chasing smoke

HOW quickly a decade can pass. One columnist is lamenting the fact that the dental veneers she had fitted ten years ago for £10,000 to allow her to smile with confidence now need replacing and the cost is £18,000. Look on the bright side. Being unable to pay that much, you won't be doing much smiling.

A SURVEY by the forces' charity SSAFA reveals shocking levels of ignorance about the First World War among young people. One in five of the so-called millennial generation believes that Britain fought France in the 1914-18 war and one in ten think Mrs Thatcher was British prime minister at the time. My eye was caught the other day by an internet quiz headlined: "Test your knowledge of the First World War" which was illustrated with a photo of three Spitfires. Note to millennials: Your granddad may be able to explain this one.

THIS year marks the centenary of the end of the First World War. In the offices of the San Diego Sun newspaper it was remembered for all the wrong reasons, as Stanley Weintraub recalls in his book, A Stillness Heard Round the World. As the news of the Armistice broke in November 1918, a, excited Sun compositor set in print what would be the most important splash in his career. The huge front-page headline duly appeared: PEACE - FIGHTNIG ENDS.

THERE are few more time-wasting activities than chasing smoke. Yet, if we believe comments by some police traffic officers, that could be on the agenda. Drivers could be fined for using e-cigarettes at the wheel if their vision was obscured by the vapour. As far as I am aware, there is no national plague of accidents involving vape-blinding. There is, however, a nationwide epidemic of young men racing fast cars, frequently killing themselves or others. They are untaxed, uninsured, out of control and fearless, and they carry on regardless. Forget the vapers and, for that matter, forget setting up speed traps to nick little old ladies at 33mph which achieves nothing but causes endless ill-will. If the cops left the soft targets alone and began taking out the blatant law-breakers, racers and potential killers, the public would back them every inch of the way.

A READER admits he never thought he'd see the day when the words "KFC chicken shortage" and "crisis" would appear in the same sentence.

ONLINE debate on a newspaper website: Reader A: "Theresa May is looking for a compulsory vaccination that will make future voters vote Tory. All she needs is something that turns people into brain-dead zombies." Reader B:"Compulsory lobotomy?" This comes from the Guardian where they consider themselves liberal. As the saying goes: scratch a liberal, find a fascist.

ON the issue of mental arithmetic, a reader tells me: "During a consultation with a financial adviser, it was necessary to calculate 1.87 per cent of £20,000.As he reached for his calculator,I told him the answer." Mind you, this reader has one distinct advantage. He is 90.