Shropshire Star

Peter Rhodes on water funerals, a cheesy tale and the perils of censoring taste

Private Eye magazine had the canny idea of searching online to see how many times Boris Johnson had written about raiding his fridge for cheese in the dead of night – the subject of his first recent column for the Daily Mail.

Published

The Eye found no fewer than eight shameless re-hashings of this cheesy theme. Boris may not be saving the planet but he's a master of recycling.

This week sees a step forward in the transition from this world to the next. The new alternative to burial or cremation is a process called resomation which involves putting the body in a bag of hot water and alkali until it dissolves. Why do I keep thinking of kipper fillets? I'll stick with the crem, thanks.

In an article I wish I'd written, the editor of the Spectator Fraser Nelson condemns the press watchdog Ipso for finding Jeremy Clarkson guilty of sexism in his column expressing his hatred of the Duchess of Sussex. Whatever happened, Nelson asks, to Ipso's founding principles of defending opinions, even if they happen to offend some people?

It is worrying. Until now you could, quite rightly, be censured for hate speech or inaccuracies but the Clarkson ruling seems to be penalising bad taste. As I wrote back in January: “Since when were free-born Brits only allowed to express tasteful opinions? And when did disliking a duchess become a sacking offence?”

Where will it end? Ultimately, will we be forbidden from expressing any criticism of anyone, on pain of being censured by Ipso? We expect columnists and other commentators to be provocative, irreverent and amusing, not bland, deferential and timid.

Rishi Sunak is a really nice prime minister but Keir Starmer is also very nice and maybe he should be the next PM. William and Kate are two especially nice royals but isn't it a shame that Harry and Meghan (who are really sweet people) have fallen out with them? Nicola Sturgeon is a really popular politician and an inspiration to campervan owners everywhere. In fact, wherever you look in politics these days, you find kind, intelligent, hard-working people all doing wonderful things. (This column has been approved by Ipso).